Land of a T H O U S A N D words...

What is Regret... Regret in dictionary have various meanings- here are juz two meanings that i have picked out that realli best describe how i feel...
1) A sense of loss and longing for someone or something gone.
2) A feeling of disappointment or distress about something that one wishes could be different.
Guess everyone have had their very own regretting moments before.. N it juz happen to me not long.. is like juz a few days back.. to be more exact it was actually on Wednesday... Alrt.. am realli having a sense of disappointment in myself for not taking part and turning down the JP Morgan Coporate 5.6KM run even when i was offered to have the chance to run even on the very last min... damn.. juz becoz of my fear to turnout to be the very last soul to return to the finishing line.. i actually didnt convince myself to take part in the run... Now sitting here and looking back.. how i wish i could have juz ran on that very day and complete the entire course with 14 000 people out there... I realli admired those who were brave enuff to take up the challenge.. I realli feel embrassed... esp when i see old athletes running across the finishing lines...in my heart i tot i could do better than some other runners.. but in the other hand.. things always look easy when u juz view it with ur eyes.. Guess my timing will be real lousy if i had ran the course yst.. think by den i'll den realise actually i aint as good as i tot i'm, when compared to the others.. Anyhow.. the male finisher for the coporate race took only 18:23 mins to complete 5.6Km and the female finisher took ard 20 mins plus.. damn fast alrt.. they realli have real real biggy lungs i muz say... they were also last year first finisher for the run... Power!!! Of coz i believe they muz have been training real hard everyday.... My company that louis koo look-a-like also ran a pretty good timing...

My company will be having a cross country run at Machrichi on 13th May.. and is like 0645-1000... when i see the timing i wanna die already...so early.. cal me how to wake up and run.. even if i can wake up.. dun even think i'll have the energy to run lah... But i guess if i miss this chance to run again.. i'll regret again.. i duno.. it is juz like ur soul wanna do it but not ya body... my mental is realli getting from bad to worst.. so is my physical.. trying to keep up and live a healthy lifestyle.. but seems like i'm weaker than ever.. now even though i may still display muscles.. but all the muscles are like juz for display and show.. they aint have any power u noe... i think i cant even do standard and proper push-ups now... Say me pessimistic or say me useless.. i juz aint a person that believe in myself... i noe i've got to change.. i should learn to believe in wat i'm capable of.. but when i start to believe.. i always see someone better than me... Not that i wan to be the best or No.1 in the world... i duno.. is juz hard for me to convince myself that i'm strong and fit u noe... damn.. guess i realli need to see a psychiatrist ha... Anyhow juz hope thru more of running and daily activities.. i can learn to believe in myself more... Thanx for all my pals out there who have believe in me all along.. i realli appreciate all ur faith... THANXXXX

Okie.. Yst was my supervisor birthday.. Mingli and I are damn 2 sweet ppl haha (We're not bhb but stating the fact, Oops!) we brought her a famous amos heart shape cookie cake with wordings Happy Birthday Trixie on top of it.. realli a sweetie and nicey cookie cake ha but too bad we didnt manage to take photos of it.. as the nicey salesgirl help us to package it into the lovely container and seal it b4 we can have a chance to take photo of it..sianz... Okie.. if u think we're still not sweet enuff.. we actually did a card for her too yea.. is handmade okie ha... Of coz with the technology and generation now.. we also very high-tech... we used photoshop and our creativity and did a real nice card for her..sorry also no photo...didnt manage to take too as our hp are surrender at the guard hse... Anyhow..It realli touches her alrt.. so yea.. we feel real happy too.. it mayb a real small gift.. but afterall is our thoughts tat counts rite...

This week passed real fast for me.. Nxt week will be week 9 already.. and only left 6 more weeks to go b4 i stepped out of STK and back to skool again... this week passed real fast as mingli and i have been engaging in lotsa other activities rather than our projects lolx.. Tues my department have free lunching in celebrating all the April babies birthday, so Mingli and I were included to help out in the preparation process.. Wed we went out having free-lunching again.. coz my department (my supervisor's grp) won the SUDOKU competition.. so we all went to have curry fish head... Okie.. den thurs was other outing day.. went to portsdown STK to attend a Loss Weight Porgramme Talk...den went NUS to have lunch den went DSO... so by den when we return to STK.. already 4 plus plus and ready to go home lolx... I realli like outings like this ha.. coz the time of me engaging in working lessen.. sorry if i'm such a lazy bum.. but who would like to stay in the office and infront of the comp 24/7... Yst also played badminton singles for 1hr30mins.. damn tired.. but good sweat haha... thanx da bu dian for the coaching.. u're realli good!!!

Alrt.. yst was also a day where i found out so many ppl are so crazy over Da Chang Jing yea.. coz everywhere i go.. no matter in the office, out in da shopping mall or in the MRT... i bound to hear someone hp ringtone that is Da Chang Jing themesong... And i can hear lotsa uncles and ah pas whistling the themesong... i'm realli amaze by the influence and frenzy da chang jing brought into asia and singapore...

Have not been seeing Ailing after prom nite and our last class gathering i guess... is realli nice to see her again on Thurs yea.. and realli nice to still have a topic to chat on haha.. Anyhow.. u still look as great and pretty as ever...*envy

Alrt.. now i bet u should step any closer to Mingli.. think she's realli on fire.. going to explode any second.. coz our boss and the other duno-call-what-name guy call her to do lotsa stuff... and i'm here blogging haha... Her project is realli tough i guess... She's kinda depressed now.. coz her long long holi instead of play and make more money.. she gotto work on her project too.. suddenly.. i duno to feel that i'm lucky or i'm juz useless tat ppl dun wanna used me ha... anyhow.. my report is all half-done... realli realli need to buck-up...Jia yOU
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